I have a sad tale today- what’s worse is for some reason I can’t stop laughing about it. It was a few nights ago and I was staying at my sister’s house. I bounce in between her house and my friend Eric’s house. I started staying at my sister’s house a few years ago after my traumatic brain injury, and just never got around to leaving. Well, I leave and go stay at Eric’s when my sister is home, but she’s out of town a lot, so I have a room at each of their houses and just kind of go between the two. I realize I’m a bit old to be couch surfing in essence, but it is what it is. Anyhow, my sister was a bit under the weather last week so I went to help take care of her and the pups. She had gone to bed early so I was doing some cleaning. With 2 dogs and a cat the floors are a constant battle. I’m a little OCD about keeping them clean, so I was cleaning under the couch and saw a strange cat huddled in the corner. There are a lot of feral cats in the neighborhood, and it’s not uncommon for one to sneak in through the doggy door, so I wasn’t horribly surprised. I tried coaxing the lil bugger out but he just hissed at me, I even tried using one of the lickable cat treats- salmon flavored nonetheless, but he wasn’t buying it. Eventually, I got the broom out and pushed him out. My plan was to use the broom and herd him out the front door but he made a break for it and made it into the laundry room and jumped behind the dryer. Well, there was no good way for me to get him out from behind there because the washer and dryer are kind of set back into this alcove, so I put the cat treat in the middle of the room and closed the door…and waited…and waited. Finally, I heard some movement and tried to slowly inch into the room- my new plan was to scoot him into the garage because it’s attached to the laundry room. I had no sooner got in the room and he dashed into the corner and tried to hide behind this cart in the corner. It’s a little cart that my sister uses when she does hair, so it really wasn’t much of a hiding place. I stuck my head around the side and looked him straight in the eyes, tried to talk soothing so he knew I wasn’t trying to hurt him, but he freaked the f*** out! Tried leaping out but knocked the cart over and broke it, hair products went everywhere and then he leapt onto the shelves where the food is and knocked over a bunch of cans, which scared him even more…I got the door to the garage open and was trying to show him it was the way out but he was too freaked out to notice, so I grabbed the broom again and eventually got him out. I closed the door and looked around and just lost it, it looked like world war 3 in that room! Hair products and cans all over the floor, black plastic shattered from the cart…a friggin mess. I cleaned it up, and went to check on my sister.
Being a good sister I fixed her a little plate of crackers and a Propel and poked my head in on her. She was sleeping but I woke her up to tell her about the cat and get her to drink something if nothing else. I told her how I found a cat under the couch and she said, “Was it black and white?” “Yes!” I said, thinking he must be a repeat offender. “That’s Brittany’s cat.” she said, “I’m watching him for the week.” I just stared at her, then I started laughing. I couldn’t help it, it probably wasn’t that funny, but it just struck me as funny. I friggin destroyed the laundry room chasing out a cat that was supposed to be a guest! My sister wasn’t amused when I explained what was so funny. She wanted me to go find Arlo- apparently that’s his name. In my defense, how was I supposed to know?! He hissed at me! If he was a guest maybe he should be a little more polite. Well, I tried finding Arlo- I looked that night and the next day, but alas, Arlo is MIA. I’m hoping he found a nice home. Guess the moral of the story is- if you’re a guest at someone’s house, don’t be a jerk or they might chase you out with a broom. And, if you are watching a pet for a friend, maybe let your sister know. Not exactly an inspiring blog today, but maybe it helped you laugh a little. Till next time- peace out.
